Friday, June 25, 2010

Glass half Empty

Ragnar training day 3 complete! I am feeling pretty good about sticking with it this week but at the same time I am totally freaked out about the training a couple of weeks from now (30 minutes on a hill anyone?). That's so my personality, I have a hard time living in the moment and being present. I am always looking forward at something that makes me stressed/sad/upset. I am a glass half-empty kinda person and it annoys me. Why can't I be happy that I have made it this far with my running? Why am I already thinking to myself that even though I made it this far to not get to happy because I will never be able to do all the running that is required? It BUGS me, I BUG me, Yup, I do.

Anyway, My head is a little all over the place today because of a ton of work stress. Things are being "re-worked" and I may not have a job or if I have a job it may not (probably not) work out as well as the position I have now. I currently work full time but my job is basically to track projects and budgets in Microsoft project all day (minimal human contact), which works out really well because most days I can work with my daughter at home with me. I can work the hours I need to and don't have to worry about leaving her at daycare (which I can't afford), so the fact that my perfect situation may be coming to an end has my brain all be-jumbled. Serious stress. But the good news is, I haven't tried to ease the stress with food, or more specifically, chocolate. So there is a little something positive about this but mostly my mind is constantly on the negative. Sigh.

2 comments:

Missy said...

Ugh, I hope the job situation works out. It's no fun when you're worried about a paycheck.

You can do the running!!! Just put your mind to it. :)

Heidi said...

Just hang in there with the running! I know you can do it if you don't think too far ahead :-) Just focus on what you are doing now. Ugh, the job stuff would keep me up at night too though.